Gay Guy Meth Story

[It is almost 10 p.m. on May 8th. Lisa is working on a story on her blog when her phone rings. The ringtone is the music to Weezer's "We Are All on Drugs" She answers on the part that goes "...ooonnnnn druuuugs..."]

LISA: Hello?

LISA'S FRIEND: Hey Lis, saw you called earlier, wassup?

LISA: Oh yeah. Hey. Not much, I was bored but now I'm finishing up a story on my blog.

LISA'S FRIEND: Oh yeah, whattcha writin'?

LISA: A Gay Guy Meth Story.

LISA'S FRIEND: A what?

LISA: [talking louder this time] A GAY GUY METH STORY!

LISA'S FRIEND: [long pause, then] You're weird Lisa. That's weird.

LISA: I write things that interest me.

LISA'S FRIEND: Yeah, but a gay guy meth story? What happened to that novel you were working on? Did it change or something?

[Lisa looks at her computer and the chicken scratch notes for her novel "Elly Mae & The Science of Love." She's frustrated with the structured approach of her book and is having writer's block. To free her brain she writes something different everyday, usually based on inspiration from a documentary, book, or song. This gay guy story was inspired by a documentary on gay men called "Meth." She sighs and takes a swig of coffee from a cup that has been there since that morning when she started working. It is ice cold.]

LISA: No, I didn't change it.

[another long pause. Lisa's friend coughs.]

LISA'S FRIEND: You're not on drugs are you? Cuz if you are, you can tell me. I know you secretly write stuff on your blog to come clean in your life. [Lisa's Friend laughs at her joke.]

LISA: I'm not on drugs. I'm just frustrated.

[Lisa's Friend giggles and takes a deep breath before saying her next line.]

LISA'S FRIEND: Wanna go get drunk?

LISA: Ok.

[Lisa hangs up and pretties herself up for some late night drinking. The Cure for Writers Block 101.]

Weezer - We are all on Drugs